Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about my social life—and I’ve come to realize: I’m a social beginner.
It’s like building a character in an RPG. I’ve put all my stat points into work and neglected the social tree. So now, every time I enter a conversation, I feel under-leveled. I second-guess everything I say, worry I’m coming off weird or annoying, and spiral into analysis mode.
Meanwhile, I see other people who seem to just get it. They’re effortlessly themselves, floating through social life like they’ve unlocked some hidden charisma passive I never specced into. Why doesn’t it come naturally to me?
But then I remember—this isn’t the first time I’ve felt this way. When I start a new video game, I get the same feeling. At first, nothing makes sense. I fumble through the mechanics, make mistakes, and assume everyone else just got lucky or was born good. But really, I just don’t understand the rules yet.
And the only way to get better at a game?
You play more.
So I’m trying to stop overthinking and start “playing” more—reaching out, showing up, and talking to people I care about. I don’t need to optimize it. I just need to play.